Lessons Learned from Weekends Past

Actually, just the weekend past. But I wanted to sound all existential and shit. Or, you know, whatever.  I really  have no idea what existential really means.  But isn’t that kind of the point?

Anyway, I thought I’d share some pearls of wisdom.

• Being super anal about having your 22 month old in a life vest while on a boat is a good idea.  Taking said life vest OFF of 22 month old while playing on the beach will inevitably lead to him walking off an unseen sand shelf and going under water.  While you’re 15 feet away.



• 22 month olds who walk off a sand shelf are NOT happy about it when you finally pull them out of the water.
• 22 month olds who walk off a sand shelf burp A LOT after swallowing a bunch of lake water.
• 30 year olds whose 22 month old walks off a sand shelf require copious amounts of wine later in the evening to calm their nerves.
• If you get “moisture” damage to your iPhone and have to have it replaced for $199 and you also buy a $50 case that will plug all the holes so that you can prevent any further possible “moisture” damage (breath),  as SOON as you have to take that case off the phone to plug in your extra battery, you will spill beer on the bar table, which will run in a STRAIGHT path directly into your purse, which is on the floor.  You know your purse? The one which holds your new (refurbished?) $199 iPhone.  The new (refurbished?) $199 iPhone WITHOUT the $49.95 OtterBox Defender Series case for iPhone 3G.  The one that would keep all the beer OFF of your phone.
• A purse with beer spilled in it smells just as good two days later as you think it does.
• If you go out drinking with these three girls (see photo below), you will drink A LOT.  And do a shot for the first time in years.



Yours Truly, EmmieJ, Julie and Andrea

• If you plan on going out drinking with those three girls, having your mommy drop you off and pick you up is a GREAT idea.
• When the waitress at Hacienda’s in Old Town Folsom recommends their Carnitas because they’re “really good”, ask her what her other experience with Carnitas is.  Chances are she doesn’t really KNOW what Carnitas should be.  Because, honey, those were NOT good.  At all.
• Also?  Ask her what her definition of “really good” is.

  

  This is me trying to bite through my Carnitas (which I couldn’t do, btw).  EmmieJ has a KNACK for timing.

• The Powerhouse Pub in Old Town Folsom is a cool spot.  But, dudes, charging a $12 cover?  Not cool.  Especially when we just ended up staying next door where we were accosted by a fake Australian guy who claimed to be an ex-cop.  I’m not entirely sure what the lesson is there.  Except that the Powerhouse Pub shouldn’t charge a $12 cover.  Because, EH, whatever.
• Scarlet’s in Old Town Folsom has the largest man that I’ve ever seen employed as a bouncer .  And I’ve stood next to Shaq, so that’s saying a lot.

  AGAIN, EmmieJ with the AWESOME camera skills

• • 

  Julie managed a little better shot.

And finally, the winner of my OtterBox giveaway IS…

The Mommy Tsunami!



And that’s all she wrote.  For now.

***The new (refurbished?) $199 iPhone is fine, thank goodness***

Related posts:

1. Lessons Learned at The Zoo